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Single and ready to mingle…

This post is properly titled. Although I do not know who I will be mingling with! This has been an ongoing conversation topic of mine since speaking with my brothers about it a couple weeks back. Honestly, I am in no position to seek out a romantic relationship, but I am preparing for that in my future, so this is a VERY important topic. When I finally do get ‘ready’ how will I start?

Internet dating is in, but I completely refuse to do that. Sorry I just can’t. **PSA** Please, if you have never met me and you are reading this, do not message me over Facebook to ‘try to get to know me’. Just don’t.  Outside of that, if I don’t happen to run into someone in my many social activities then I guess (?) I’m just out of luck.

So this is where the conversation trailed. We started with my preferences. Ultimately as I have stated before, “I would like to marry an African American male who’s parents survived the Civil Rights movement and had enough sense to tell him about it.” There are approximately 21.5 million  of these “African-American” males out there. Once I solidified that fact, my brother quickly chimed in and said I had to discount the 10-15% of black males that were hiding in the closet or openly homosexual. Statistically I could not find proof for this percentage, though what I did find was disheartening enough to roll with this number.

Since my preferences really aren’t that specific, we decided to just continue on by focusing on finding my black male counter part. But automatically I knew we had to also discount from the 18.3 million black men still available/willing, the ones who are in prison or have been in prison. That was a hard hit. (Now in this rough math. We are assuming each characteristic is mutually exclusive, i.e. the gay guy has not been to prison/or arrested). The approximate percentage of black male ex-offenders and current inmates is 40%!!!! (wtf) That brings the pool to 9.7 million-hopefully handsome- black men.

Between the ages of 20 and 29, one black man in nine is behind bars. For black women of the same age, the figure is about one in 150. –theEconomist

9.7 million. But Wait! Off the top I’m down 55% on the pool and we haven’t even accounted for AGE, which in essence kills the basis for using this gracious full population stat. So let’s try this with a conservative age group of 25-34 year old black males. That total population is 11.12 million. That aren’t gay-9.45 million. And that aren’t in prison/prior offender equals roughly 5.67 million hopefully-handsome black men.

So let’s start with the compatibility (I’m still positive at this point). I found education to be one of my most important values.  Side note: With out getting too far up the ladder to my soap box, I will say that common sense is a theory. [That statement’s really going to mess some of you up.] I have a lot of degrees and in NO way expect my counterpart to have that many, but ‘being compatible’ would mean that they have pursued AND completed a graduate or professional degree. That number equals 758,000, a mere 13.34% of that 5.67 million hopefully-handsome black men ages 25-34.

To search for more compatibility requires me to kill the mutually exclusive clause. I’m an athlete and enjoy living an active lifestyle.  I’d say my future partner will have to do a tad bit more than keeping up with ESPN. What are my chances that of those 758,000 educated, hopefully-handsome black men, that they are also current or former/current high-level competing athletes. (I really wanted to say professional here, but that is SUCH a stretch.)  I mean as I do research it seems to be almost foreign for players in the big 4 leagues to even have a college degree. I mean only 4% of MLB players have a college degree, that’s ridiculous. I had more luck finding individual names that lists.

So for all those interested here is [hopefully a very incomplete] list of current/former professional athletes with graduate degrees.

  • Craig Breslow, RP, Oakland A’s
  • Myron Rolle, S, Tennessee Titans
  • Ross Ohlendorf, SP, Pittsburgh Pirates
  • George Parros, F, Anaheim Ducks
  • Greg McElroy, Former QB NFL
  • Ryan Fitzpatrick, QB, Buffalo Bills
  • Matt Birk, C, Baltimore Ravens
  • Alex Smith, QB, San Francisco 49ers
  • Matt Bonner, F, San Antonio Spurs
  • Brian Bannister, P, Kansas City Royals
  • Robert Griffin III, QB Washington Redskins

woman_laughing_gif_by_rainfyre-d55wev2Sigh…so when we first had this discussion I laughed a jokingly ended it by saying, “so basically Myron Rolle.” Which in result seems to be about accurate. This list has to be severely under-reported so if anyone else finds a good source please let me know. Obviously age was a big deterrent here, I excluded people outside of the age range for this brief list.

So my conclusion…

  • A good looking man is a good looking man.  Never discriminate. I can’t be picky because statistically it really is going to take a miracle from God the father. Truthfully, it’s going to take a miracle from the heavens above either way! I don’t post this out of pity, I post this out of my usual intentions of connecting you with me. Help a sister out! I’ll go on a blind date. 🙂
  • If you happen to be in a relationship with a black male (that is not in prison), consider yourself fortunate.
  • I will say, keep all those stereotypes about black women to yourself. Keep leaving us out of the picture and I’m sure we will be running the world one day.

I would love to hear your take. Is Nathalie hopeless, or will her friends connect her with her counterpart? Are you a black male that fits this demographic? How does this post make you feel?  ::suspense:: Will Nathalie ever find love again? Stay tuned… @nreshard

Published in Faith Personal Sports and Society


  1. […] For more on the breakdown of numbers by Nathalie Reshard looking for a straight black man with multiple degrees, who is a high performing athlete and who has never been to prison, visit her blog post here.  […]

  2. […] For more on the breakdown of numbers by Nathalie Reshard looking for a straight black man with multiple degrees, who is a high performing athlete and who has never been to prison, visit her blog post here.  […]

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